typical text message conversation with andy.
Andy: Dude, second fatal shark attack in less than a week! Sharks are pissed!
Taylor: We've been peeing in the ocean for far too long with no consequences.
Taylor: There was a 3rd attack yesterday in Florida. That's 3 for 3 for shark-kind.
Andy: Well, at least they haven't taken to land yet.
Taylor: Ding-dong! (doorbell) Who could that be? Door slams open to reveal gnarly shark wearing board shorts and a fluorescent mustle T. Shark attack sucka! Street sharks!
Andy: Holy crap, it's time to fight back. I'm getting my surfboard back, laser mounting it and taking it to the sea. Either that, or filling a wet suit with mustard and setting it afloat. What a joke! Mustard isn't good on neoprene!
Taylor: I'd fill it with gefelte fish. he'd be eating pickled abomination. That'd teach him.
Andy: Unless he was a jew. It would be just my luck that he would be of hebrew decent and the gefelte fish would bring him warm memories of childhood with grandma or something.
Taylor: You know what must really get a shark mad? Is all these penguin movies making them look all innocent and lovable. It'd be like making a movie "march of the hamburgers" which made people feel bad about innocent burgers getting chomped on the open sea.