Even though I've never heard of somebody failing their PhD Defense I still woke up to some serious butterflies in my stomach this morning. My mind flew back to when I was a 7 or 8 yr old kid playing baseball. I was a horrible player and one day the other team's pitcher was wild! He was beaning players left and right. I was up on deck to bat next and the kid right in front of me took a fastball right to the face. I still remember the blood exploding everywhere, it was horrifying! They had to take the kid to the hospital and everything. Next thing I know my coach tells me "you're up sparks." I was so scared! I totally lied and said I had to go to the bathroom and I stayed in there for like 10 minutes shaking with fear. Eventually I had to come out and when I went up to bat I stood like 5 feet from the baseball plate and just watched those strikes zoom by.
I'd be lying if I said that I didn't feel a little bit like pretending to go to the bathroom and making a run for it as my Defense was about to start. But I survived and I was so nervous I got to talking wicked fast- I finished in 30 minutes! That's gotta be a record.
Now all I have to do is wait until May 24th when I graduate. It's been an incredible 5 years. I'm gonna miss grad school a little bit. Not the homework, bad pay, or middle of the night trips to turn off the laser, but I've met some amazing people, made great friends, grown incredibly, gained so much confidence and seen some amazing parts of the world.
I can't wait to see where we end up next.
PS- I could NOT have done it without Jodi's love and support. Janae is right, she totally earned this every bit as much as I did. She helped take care of Atticus, moved across the country, went to bed alone while I worked on homework, did the lion's share of the work around the house, and sacrificed many of her own dreams and aspirations so that I could achieve mine.